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Before I begin...
Rest in Peace, Jamie. You had so much to offer to the world, and you were taken away far too soon. We'll miss you.
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So, I finally finished up the Pirates 3 review, but I'm not quite finished with some of the more analytical character ramblings that I come across late at night and early in the morning. Those will come later. As I was going to do with my review for CSI “The Good, The Bad, and the Dominatrix” before I lost my ability to write more than 500 words at a time, I’ve decided to do the Pirates 3 review as two bulleted lists: Want and Do Not Want.
Want:
- Jack Sparrow is still Jack Sparrow. Really, whether or not you enjoy this movie depends on whether or not you’re sick of Jack Sparrow. I’m not.
Now, At World’s End does run the same risk that Dead Man’s Chest did; that is, there’s a danger of too much Jack acting too out-there because the execs that make the movies have figured out that Jack’s what sells. However, At World’s End solves this problem by going in the opposite direction that Dead Man’s Chest did; silly behavior for the sake of silly behavior (like the Cannibal Island sequence) is minimized and only used in hallucination sequences, and we start to go back to the scheming, surprising, charismatic Jack of Curse of the Black Pearl.
That said, there are some sequences (like the Davy Jones’ Locker scene) that I found a bit too bizarre. But others, like the multiple Jacklings puzzling through Jack’s inner monologues, actually worked rather well.
- Barbossa is back! I’m not sure if the lack of Barbossa was entirely responsible for the general un-fun spirit of Movie 2, but I do know that it’s a lot easier to get caught up in the whole proceedings when Geoffrey Rush is so clearly enjoying himself in his role. And why shouldn’t he enjoy himself? He’s putting on a big hat and flailing around yelling “Arrr!”. I didn’t realize how much I missed Barbossa until I got him back.
- Bill Nighy deserves major kudos for making Davy Jones sympathetic, interesting, and even pitiable, all while speaking in an occasionally unintelligible brogue and hidden behind a CGI Cthulu-face. Davy Jones was one of the more intriguing and sad characters in the whole ensemble, and I’m sorry to see him go.
Also, love for the safety bucket and the exaggerated, spaghetti-western-homage eyebrow-raise.
- Speaking of intriguing and sad characters, Norrington! *holds* I’ve been a Norrington fangirl ever since movie 1, even before everyone jumped on the Scruffington bandwagon. Will may be (slightly) cuter, but Norrington is just as deserving, if not more, of a happy ending.
I did find it a little strange that movie 3 Norrington acts like Scruffington never happened; there’s no hint of the ambition and eff-the-world attitude that James displayed in Pirates 2. But, given the situation, I suppose that makes sense.
Also, he’s still Jack Davenport. Purr.
-Pintel + Ragetti = win. I love it when I can tolerate the comic relief.
-Everyone in the theater started to cheer when Keith Richards showed up, and with good reason. Now, if nobody knew who was playing Teague Sparrow, then his appearance in the film would have been sort of pointless; just one more minor character we’re all expected to keep track of. But since it was hard not to know that Sparrow was based off of Richards and Richards would, indeed, be making a cameo as Jack’s father, the scene instead played like an amusing wink at the audience.
-That last ship battle. I kind of couldn’t breathe while that was happening. Intense, frantic, well-choreographed, with some glorious CGI that stands out from the usual computer-generated action-movie effects. While it would have been fun to see all of the pirate ships in action, and to watch the armadas of the Pirate Lords and the East India Company pound away at each other, that one battle made up for it.
- Will Turner actually kind of had a personality in this movie! Yaaaaay! I’ll save most of my thoughts on Will for my character ramblings (which are coming later), but it’s nice to see an aspect of his character that doesn’t revolve around Elizabeth. For starters, I get the feeling that Will is drawn to Jack as much as Elizabeth was in movie 2 – not necessarily in a slashy context (though Inner Slashfan is currently stuffed under a bucket), but drawn to the freedom and agency that Jack represents. Will wants to be Jack, to think like Jack, because Jack to him is emblematic of mastery of one’s own fate, which he’s never had and never really achieves. Again, discussed at length later.
- Speaking of Will, he was wearing a lovely maroon shirt this movie that I quite like. Maroon’s a good color on him. Also, I approve of the fact that he spends over 55% of this movie wet.
- At World’s End has, I think, the best opening sequence out of all the Pirates series. It’s grim, it’s dark, it’s surprising, and it sets up an interesting contrast between the singing boy on the gallows and Elizabeth’s frivolous singing at the beginning of the first movie.
Also, that song has become quite firmly stuck in my head. I’m not sure I mind.
- Costumes, costumes, costumes. Love the costume work. The Brethren Court sequence introduced a world’s worth of pirates and a world’s worth of interesting outfits to go with them. And I would give a lot for one of Elizabeth’s many dresses. I loved those dresses, impractical though I’m sure they are.
- Cutler Beckett. I shouldn’t like him, but I do. He’s a perfect counterpart to Jack – just as conniving, just as manipulative, but working for the other side. What differentiates him from Jack (and what I like about him) is that absolutely nothing fazes him. He takes even the most bizarre and unexpected occurrences with a calm, controlled demeanor, knowing he is master of every situation. I found that hard not to like.
- Will: *emerges from the sea at the helm of the Flying Dutchman with a big, expository scar on his chest*
Muppet: *leaping from her seat* I KNEW IT! I knew it I knew it I knew it! I knew Will was going to end up replacing Davy Jones! I so called this all the way back in December! WooHOO! *dances as much as one can while sitting down*
- Oh yeah – the movie was funny this time. Personal favorites: Jack and Barbossa’s competing telescopes and “I blame the fish people”.
- Barbossa has a first name wtf?
Do Not Want:
- I refuse to accept that James Norrington is dead. I refuse. I won’t do it. I will especially not accept that died to save Elizabeth, who has lied to him repeatedly, manipulated him, and broken his heart. At least he got to go out heroically.
- While we’re on the subject of “What do you mean they’re dead?!”, did we really have to kill off Governor Swann? I liked him, ineffectual pansy though he was in movie 1. I mean, I guess since his character had no further use in the narrative, they couldn’t really keep him around, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.
- At World’s End becomes dizzying complicated after about the first hour. Granted, simplicity was never the Pirates series’ strong point, but there were so many alliances and double-crosses and secret plots that I was no longer able to keep track of them all until near the end of the movie. Things got a little clearer the second go-round, but it was all still awfully hard to follow that first time. The whole thing could have benefited from about 20 fewer minutes and 5 fewer subplots.
- Too many inspirational/motivational/pre-combat speeches from Elizabeth. That kind of thing loses its impact unless done precisely once, at the beginning of a high-stakes battle with the odds stacked against you. That’s it. And even then you dangerously walk the cheesy line. That, and I still had a hard time getting my mind around the whole “pirates = freedom fighters” thing (freedom to what? Rape, pillage, plunder, murder, burn, and not pay taxes? Fun.), and all the speechifying didn’t make that any easier to swallow.
- Calypso was very underwhelming. We get all this buildup to her appearance, and we keep hearing about how powerful she is and how cruel she is, and how “the world is well rid of her”. And then she finally appears. And then…she turns into crabs, calls up a whirlpool, and is never seen again. Um, if she’s so cruel and capricious, wouldn’t it be more of a problem that she’s been released? Apparently not. *shrug*
- I’m still mad at Elizabeth for betraying and using Norrington in the first movie, and she doesn’t really redeem herself here; she still manipulates James’ feelings for her. I do appreciate that she’s an active heroine and doesn’t need to be rescued, but she still gets on my nerves.
Also, it seems pretty farfetched that Sao Feng’s crew would just accept that he had made Lizzie captain. I mean, no one saw him but her. She could be lying.
- On a similar note, I actually don’t hate Will/Elizabeth. I should, but I don’t. In spite of my best efforts to the contrary, I’m a fluffy little romantic at heart, and Will and Lizzie and their undying love omg are my guilty pleasure. Yes, I know I’ll never come across anything like that, and that their relationship bears only a passing resemblance to any sort of real human relationship, but it just feels so good to indulge.
But even I found the Will/Elizabeth kiss during the ship battle to be far, far too implausible to get my warm fuzzies on. There’s combat happening, people. Guys with guns. Guys with swords. Cannons. Slippery surfaces. Shouldn’t you be focusing on that?
I have to admit that I found the mid-battle wedding somewhat cute. But it would have been much cuter and more reasonable if they’d finished off the wedding with a quick kiss and went right back to the killing.
As evidenced by the fact that my “Want” list is substantially longer than my “Do Not Want” list, I still really enjoyed this movie. While it didn’t quite live up to the first movie, it was still a spectacular closer to the series after a weak middle chapter. At World’s End was the realization of everything that Dead Man’s Chest promised, and without all the prep time that the second movie required, the third could be nothing but pure, exciting, explosive results.
bored
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Whee, Barbossa! I love you, Geoffrey Rush. FOR SRS. MAY I PLZ HAVE YOUR BABIES NOW?
Seriously, though. That man is all sorts of love, and I was so glad to have him back!
*raises hand* I too am not sick of Jack Sparrow! I was one of the only people cracking up in the theater. His character just gives me a whole fit of giggles that I can't suppress. Depp plays him so well.
Loved the whole Elizabeth-in-power thing. Loved it, loved it, loved it.
Will, you were mucho awesome in this movie!
I have to see it again to really wrap my mind around it. But OMG...the part where the Jacklings were flailing about flamboyantly while in Davy Jones' Locker...cracked me up the most of all!
I'm sad to see this series end. :(
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Ah, but see, you know they'll make another. And another and another and another. Thing is, I'm not sure I want them to. I'm sad that the series is over, but I think it ended in a good spot. I don't think there really needs to be anymore, and I'd rather they not just keep doing the series until it's dead.
And I pretty much agree with everything you said up there, too. "We're going to have a lovely garden party, and you're not invited! "
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I hope they don't resort to making another series and raping it until it's dead. That would make me very sad inside. :(
"We're going to have a lovely garden party, and you're not invited! "
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Love it, love it, love it.
One more thing....
I wholeheartedly, 150,000% agree with you. ;) YUM...
Re: One more thing....
Re: One more thing....
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Oh, and Jack and Hector's (XDDDD) alpha male fight would have redeemed almost anything.
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Yes. Yes, he did. omg, that shirt. Why has he not been wearing that the entire series?
And I liked the wedding - I found it cute. It as just the long, improbable kiss that annoyed me. And yes, that's how I want to be married too. Beats tearing your hair out over some boring regular ceremony.
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My personal favorite anachronism is Elizabeth Swann's mysterious access to toothpaste and a Ladyshave, but that's just me.
I know I'm way behind the times. Still want to comment.
This is totally not an excuse to get as much mileage out of my icon as possible.Bullet-points, whee!
*I get the feeling that Will is drawn to Jack as much as Elizabeth was in movie 2 – not necessarily in a slashy context, but drawn to the freedom and agency that Jack represents. Will wants to be Jack, to think like Jack, because Jack to him is emblematic of mastery of one’s own fate, which he’s never had and never really achieves.
OH. That is it *exactly*. That's the most perfect definition I've ever read or ever will read.
*I made no connection whatsoever to the boy singing at the beginning of this movie and Elizabeth singing in CotBP. But now that you've pointed it out, whoa, that's interesting.
*[Beckett] takes even the most bizarre and unexpected occurrences with a calm, controlled demeanor, knowing he is master of every situation. I found that hard not to like.
Interesting, that's precisely why I couldn't stand him. That smug self-confidence made me want to rip out the material of my theater sit in frustration. And/or chuck rock-crabs at his head in an attempt to destroy that maddening calm.
*If I may ask, what prompted your foreshadowing of Will becoming captain of the Flying Dutchman? I never see things coming ahead of time.
*Too many inspirational/motivational/pre-combat speeches from Elizabeth.
GOD YES. Even flinging fruit at cannibals was preferable to that.
*There’s combat happening, people. Guys with guns. Guys with swords. Cannons. Slippery surfaces. Shouldn’t you be focusing on that?
*snert* That was more or less my reaction, too.
Re: I know I'm way behind the times. Still want to comment.
That smug self-confidence made me want to rip out the material of my theater sit in frustration.
I admit that I did much the same thing in the second movie, when I found Beckett quite irritating, but I think that was because he only really interacted with Will, Elizabeth, and Governor Swann. The calm attitude works much better when it's played against more temperamental or unpredictable characters, such as Davy Jones or Jack; it gives both personalities a better chance to stand out.
Also, considering how frightened everyone else was of Jones in the second movie, I found his general "bitch please" reaction to Davy's ranting very entertaining.
If I may ask, what prompted your foreshadowing of Will becoming captain of the Flying Dutchman?
Hmm...first off, bear in mind that I literally thought this up while watching DMC at 2 a.m., after having seen it over a dozen times, so my reasoning may not be entirely sound.
I noticed after about two viewings that Tia Dalma and Davy Jones had the same locket, so I figured out that Dalma was the one Jones had fallen in love with (though I didn't pick up on the sea-goddess angle, obviously). After I realized that, her interest in Will started to seem a little strange, and I wondered if it might have something to do with Jones, since the "destiny" she speaks of isn't realized in the second movie.
The "aha!" moment for me came when Will asked "what vexes all men?" and Dalma replies "what, indeed." Now, at first I assumed this was just Dalma being creepy, but then I wondered if she addresses her answer specifically to him because he, out of all of them, was the only one who had "run afoul of that which vexes all men", and thus was the only one in danger of sharing Jones' fate (don't ask me where that last intuitive leap came from).
By the end of the movie, Will has definitly 'run afoul' of Elizabeth, particularly after watching her snog Jack. Now, while I certainly didn't think he was going to cut out his heart over something like that, I wondered if Dalma's dialogue and his position at the end of the movie meant that he'd end up captain of the Dutchman.
Confirmation, for me, came during yet another viewing, when the barnacle-y guy on the Dutchman warns that "the Dutchman needs a living heart or there'll be no captain" - thus, whoever kills Jones must take his place. And since Will was dead-set on killing Jones, and was becoming quite a capable captain himself (witness final battle in DMC, after Jack bails), and Dalma's comments seemed to foreshadow him becoming captain, it seemed to make sense that he'd replace Jones at the Dutchman's helm.
Besides, at the time I didn't know about the whole "staying in the land of the dead for ten years" thing, so him becoming captain seemed to solve everybody's problems.
...*hands you back your comment*
(no subject)
Confirmation, for me, came during yet another viewing, when the barnacle-y guy on the Dutchman warns that "the Dutchman needs a living heart or there'll be no captain" - thus, whoever kills Jones must take his place.
Hm. Might have helped if I'd paid attention to that too; I figured Will would get his revenge, but I didn't make that connection. Then again, I still don't quite get the whole "ship needs a living heart"; I thought cutting out his heart was just Jones' wangsty over-reaction to being spurned.
(no subject)
It wasn't - they only show it breifly in her hut. It's on the table when Jack steals one of her rings. Again, I didn't know it was there until after two or three viewings.
Then again, I still don't quite get the whole "ship needs a living heart"; I thought cutting out his heart was just Jones' wangsty over-reaction to being spurned.
...Yeah, they don't do a really good job of explaining that either. But then, we don't actually *know* that he cut out his heart because of Dalma. Only person who ever tells us that is Dalma, and she could be a)lying, b)misinformed, or c)overestimating her own importance. It makes much more sense if cutting out the heart is a prerequisite of captaining the Dutchman, allowing the Captain to exist between worlds or some such thing.
But that, too, is merely a theory.