This is the worst belated Christmas present ever

[stunt_muppet]

Muppet: Hey, it's my first day working at the Bethesda store. I should show up early to make a good impression!

Muppet's Body: Merry Christmas! I got you pinkeye.

Muppet: D:

Muppet's Body: Or maybe just a stye, I'm not sure which, but either way you're going to have to take time off work to go to the eye doctor to make sure you don't give everyone else contagious eye germs.

Muppet: D:<

Muppet's Body: Oh, and you're going to have to throw out all your eye makeup.

Muppet: I HATE YOU.

Muppet's Body: I got you back pain too.